Data & Analytics built a badge access request tool

“The database isn't exposed. I think.”— Plant Manager

Reason:

Allegedly because the roadmap says Q3, but nobody wrote down the year. With a logo generated at 11:02.

Built by:

Ravi, a key account manager

Build time:

19 minutes

Built with:

Next.js, because the tutorial used it

Database:

a Postgres database called main-2-really-final

Authentication:

the audit log is a text file called audit-final.txt

Deployment:

running on a laptop with 6% battery

Responsible:

Elena, until somebody notices

Documentation:

a folder called Documentation containing another folder called Old

Security situation:

security is handled by being behind the office Wi-Fi

Future disaster:

It will become the source of truth in 3 months.

Age: 4.7 years · originally expected to last 14 days · 6 owners so far · survived 3 reorganisations · last meaningful change 19 days ago

Rated common mostly because: alive 121x longer than intended, 29 users, 1 accidental connections.