Operations built a performance review form

“It's faster this way.”— Olivier, Operations

Reason:

Because Leads_FIXED.xlsx is stored on Lukas's desktop. Renamed three times to avoid attention.

Built by:

Olivier, someone from Procurement

Build time:

12 minutes

Built with:

an AI agent with shell access

Database:

a CSV that gets overwritten every Monday

Authentication:

the encryption key is stored next to the encrypted data

Deployment:

using a self-signed certificate everybody has accepted

Responsible:

the business

Documentation:

a file called README-NEW-FINAL.md

Security situation:

the admin page is protected by not linking to it

Future disaster:

It will stop working after someone renames a column.

Age: 5.7 years · originally expected to last 2 months · 3 owners so far · survived 1 reorganisation · last meaningful change 210 days ago

Rated legendary mostly because: €2.0m per year, 244 users, alive 35x longer than intended.