Operations built a vendor onboarding portal

“Claude wrote most of it.”— HR Generalist

Reason:

Officially because the fax machine is still somehow involved. Built in 1 hours 38 minutes and demonstrated immediately afterwards.

Built by:

Petra, a key account manager

Build time:

an afternoon, mostly

Built with:

Google Apps Script

Database:

UUIDs stored as VARCHAR(255), just in case

Authentication:

Google sign-in, any Google account

Deployment:

using a self-signed certificate everybody has accepted

Responsible:

Marco, currently on parental leave

Documentation:

tribal knowledge, technically

Security situation:

the security review consisted of Thomas saying "looks fine"

Future disaster:

It will overwrite the official data with yesterday's export.

Age: 9.2 years · originally expected to last 3 months · 2 owners so far · survived 2 reorganisations · last meaningful change 74 days ago · original builder left 482 days ago

Rated common mostly because: 3 departments depend on it, alive 37x longer than intended, the builder has left.