Investor Relations built a lost customer win-back tracker

“It only writes when necessary.”— Ravi, Investor Relations

Reason:

Officially because the bug is now documented behaviour. Forked from a tutorial at 11:56 and never cleaned up.

Built by:

Ravi, a key account manager

Build time:

one weekend

Built with:

Cursor, with YOLO mode emotionally enabled

Database:

a backup drive that has not been plugged in for 5 months

Authentication:

the password manager is someone's browser

Deployment:

hosted on Kevin's personal Vercel account

Responsible:

Sofia, who inherited it during a reorganisation

Documentation:

Lukas's memory

Security situation:

it logs full customer records to the console

Future disaster:

It will be mentioned in an audit finding using the words "material weakness".

Age: 4.1 years · originally expected to last 4 weeks · 5 owners so far · survived 2 reorganisations · last meaningful change 210 days ago · original builder left 1495 days ago

Rated rare mostly because: €183k per year, 92 users, 3 departments depend on it.