What you are claiming
Procurement built a sales dashboard nobody asked for
“It's technically not production.”— Priya, Procurement
- Reason:
- Officially because the intranet logs you out after 4 minutes of inactivity. With 3 tests, all skipped.
- Built by:
- Priya, a warehouse supervisor
- Build time:
- 4 hours 23 minutes
- Built with:
- Laravel, maintained by one contractor
- Database:
- MongoDB where every document has a different schema
- Authentication:
- IP allow-list containing 0.0.0.0/0
- Deployment:
- deployed behind a Cloudflare Tunnel from Kevin's laptop
- Responsible:
- IT, according to Finance
- Documentation:
- an onboarding call everyone is expected to remember
- Security situation:
- production secrets are in the frontend bundle
- Future disaster:
- It will stop working after someone renames a column.
Accidentally connected to (1)
- → depends on a browser extension
Age: 121 days · originally expected to last 4 weeks · 2 owners so far · survived 1 reorganisation · last meaningful change 19 days ago
Rated mythic mostly because: €6.5m per year, 827 users, 1 accidental connections.
Steal this mistake
Procurement built a sales dashboard nobody asked for
$1
Pay $1 to steal this disaster and take their place in the vibe coded box of shame. Minimum $1 — pay more to make it harder to steal from you.
Currently claimed by ChartMaster3000 for $0. They get none of this money.
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