CEO's Daughter built a KPI wall for a screen nobody looks at

“It's only 800 lines.”— Marco, CEO's Daughter

Reason:

Allegedly because copy of copy of Suppliers.xlsx finally crashed at 16:52. With 2 tests, all skipped.

Built by:

Marco, a warehouse supervisor

Build time:

a long Thursday

Built with:

Svelte, which nobody else here writes

Database:

a backup drive that has not been plugged in for 17 months

Authentication:

MFA is optional, so naturally nobody uses it

Deployment:

running on port 5000 in production

Responsible:

Nadia and Chen, who each think the other owns it

Documentation:

a Confluence page owned by Miriam, who left

Security situation:

CSRF protection was temporarily disabled

Future disaster:

It will turn out to be the only system that knows the real numbers.

Age: 1.1 years · originally expected to last 7 days · 1 owner so far · survived 1 reorganisation · last meaningful change 403 days ago

Rated common mostly because: alive 58x longer than intended, 1 accidental connections, 1 departments depend on it.